Friday Sign of the Apocalypse: Now and Then

Than, people. Than. Everyone gets this wrong now and then, though. We like how they went all out with "unable to" instead of can't--is this why they ran out of steam when they came to abbreviating "management."

Because When You're Moving, You're Harder to Hit

Check out the last line of this warning sign photographed by Barry L.

They meant to write "stay away from the partition when it's moving" or something along those lines. It's another case of not-quite-right construction that results in giggles. "While" is a conjunction (and sometimes a noun) that means, essentially, "at the same time" (and a few other things).

The second part of the sentence needs a subject, or the "in motion" will refer back to the subject in the first part.

What's the fix? Always read out loud. The ear catches these things better than the eye. And, choose the simplest way to say something, rather than the most official sounding. "Students: Stay away from the partition when it's moving."

In Defense of a Young Paul McCartney

The Guardian has a piece today about the earliest example of writing by Paul McCartney--an essay he wrote when he was just 10.

The essay has specialist significance for Beatles enthusiasts thanks to a grammatical error, ringed in red by his English master at Joseph Williams primary school in Belle Vale. Although McCartney may have been wrong to begin two sentences with the conjunction "But", his capital Bs reveal the same twirly ends later used on the Beatles' drum skin in 1962 – his contribution to the design. (Read the rest.)

Let's just have a moment of awww for how cute this is. We always liked Ringo for his big, goofy nose. But now, we're going with the crowd. Paul McCartney really is the cutest Beatle, at least until someone digs up Ringo's math homework from third grade.

McCartney's only real mistake here was starting a sentence with a conjunction in an English class. English teachers are often wrongly hung up on this non-error. Great writers have started sentences with conjunctions for at least as long as English teachers have been slinging red pens. It's not worth arguing the point with the teachers, though, because they're the ones who have the power to give out the points that count toward one's grade.

Our Favorite Basketball Player

We always loved Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. When we were little and culturally insensitive, his name reminded us of some sort of delicious soup. Now that we know better than to admit such things, we love him for his enthusiasm for punctuation and grammar:

Here's how he's quoted in the Los Angeles Times:

"I loved school, loved UCLA," Abdul-Jabbar says. "I remember, in an English class taught by a Mr. Lindstrom, we were asked to do essays and he said he would read the best three to the entire class. He read the first two, then said he was going to read the best one, and it was mine.

"It was right then that I thought maybe I could do this, that maybe I had what it takes."He also played at UCLA for John Wooden, always more English teacher than coach."We'd sit on the bus and talk about when to use a colon and when a semicolon," Abdul-Jabbar says. "We'd argue the difference between "like" and "as if."

Conjunction Dysfunction

We're doing a little research for Encarta on presidential debates and famous zingers, and we came across this dysfunctional conjunction at the Commission on Presidential Debates:

DebateWatch is a voter education program of the Commission on Presidential Debates (CPD). DebateWatch brings citizens like you together to watch the televised debates, talk about what you learned, and, if you choose to, share your reactions with the CPD.

The beauty of this program is its flexibility; anyone can participate including children, young adults, or retirees. DebateWatches can take place in high-profile televised venues with hundreds of people, or they can occur in people's living rooms with half a dozen neighbors.

What's with the "or"? It makes it sound as though either children OR retirees can participate, but not both. That's hardly the beautiful flexibility they're promising.

Take care with conjunctions. They're not interchangeable.