If anyone is driving on I-75 between Orlando and Tampa, he or she will be well warned by the flashing, DOT sign of "Nightly Lane Closers" starting 05-27-06.
"Closure" is what happens when the highway is shut down. It can also occur after one throws a pie in the face of a cheating boyfriend (provided this is not done in one's own apartment; cleaning up the mess afterward would only reopen the wounds).A "closer" is someone who closes or ends something — the last pitcher in a baseball game, or perhaps a final act in a nightclub show.
Maybe the Florida Department of Transportation really did mean to use "closer," though.
Our hopes are high that they're hiring entertainers to cheer the spirits of commuters stuck in Disneyworld traffic. "Buckle up! It's a small, crowded highway, after all! You're beautiful! We'll be here all week — try the veal!"
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