Tuesday, August 19, 2008

Behold! The Portmanteaus

The contestants for our portmanteau challenge are finally sorted and polished. We removed proper nouns and submissions that were too gross for even our rather bawdy standards.

What we're going to do is post the contestants, then post a voting box. There are quite a few, so we thank you in advance for your patience.

The winner here receives something from the SPOGG shop (or a signed copy of Things That Make Us [Sic] once it's available), so the stakes are TERRIBLY HIGH. Please vote anyway.

It is worth observing that the members of SPOGG like to give their pets portmanteau names. Petmanteaus? Woof!

Without further ado, the contestants:

absotively: absolutely + positively

afreakinAmerican: what every citizen of the U.S. is

anticappointment: anticipation + disappointment

bechother: by each other

beerble beer + bible: recipes for home brewers

bromance: brother + romance a close relationship between two heterosexual males

bromance (2): brother + romance: a special way of wooing a coed

chillax: chill + relax

clearify: clear+clarify

clickerdamn: clicker + damn (for missing remote control)

cloffice: closet + office

crankonymous: online complainers

destinesia: destination + amnesia (forgetting where you were going)

disfraction: diverting someone's attention 1/3rd of the time

dramastically: dramatically + drastically

dramedy/docudrama: drama + comedy/ documentary + drama

excessories: excess accessories

exitinerary: exit + itinerary: plan to leave a social gathering

ex wife in law: ex wife of your current husband

flustrated: flustered + frustrated.

frattastic: people who are too involved in Greek life in college

ginormous: giant + enormous

grouch potato: grouch + couch potato

guanachos: guacamole + nachos

Guinnass: Guinness + ass: what happens the day after

guyliner: guy + eyeliner

halfheimers: halfway + Alzheimers

hormonevator: hormone + elevator that up and down monthly ride women take; can also refer to puberty or menopause (see your daughter, mother, friend, or self)

hormoniac: someone who is completely and utterly crazy due to fluctuating hormone levels

ignoranus: an ignorant a$$hole

insinuendo: insinuate + innuendo

jick: jock + Jill … a female athlete

juxtapose: The word “juxt,” as in, “I juxt love hamburgers,” and “tapose,” meaning to pose. He stood atop the Eiffel Tower juxtapose for the camera.

kittenality: kitten + nationality lubriclot: the annoying chunk of lotion at the end of the bottle

mallternative: mall+alternative: disaffected suburban youth who shop at Hot Topic to look rebellious

mandals: man + sandals (strappy!)

manster: man+monster

manties: man + panties (effeminate)

mexcellent: Mexican + excellent (applies to food)

onomateration: onomatopoeia + alliteration, e.g. drip drop, clip clop, and squish squelch

pamphliture: pamphlet+literature (those tourist brochures)

phunobulous: phenomenal, fun, and fabulous

politick: politician + tick, a politician who gets under your skin

robotricks: robot + tricks

shart: what happens when you try to pass gass, but instead pass something else more substantial

shoerectomy: This is the operation one receives after they have thoroughly pissed someone off who doesn't mind kicking a little butt.

snacktivate: snack + activate

snarcastic: snarky + sarcastic

spagnineophile: a dog that loves spaghetti

squarts: squirting + farts

staycation: staying + vacation (a vacation at home)

teleroboketer: a telemarketer who has been brainwashed by their company to say the same script over and over

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